You are the first dream, the only dream I ever was unable to stop myself from dreaming. And that is why I envied Sydney, for he was free.Īnd now at last I am free, and I can finally tell you, without fear of danger to you, all that I feel in my heart. I would have chosen death for a chance to tell you the truth, Tessa, if I could have been assured that death would be my own. At least he could do something to prove his passion, even if that thing was to die. Yes, Sydney, for even if he had no hope that the woman he loved would love him, at least he could tell her of his love. When I read it for the second time, with an open mind and heart, I felt the most complete despair and envy of Sydney Carton. You taught me to love this book where I had scorned it. Why have I written these words in this book? Because of you. Strange to imagine that, isn’t it – a heart ringing – but when you touch me that is what it is like: as if my heart is ringing in my chest and the sound shivers down my veins and splinters my bones with joy. Was there ever a more beautiful sound than your name? To speak it aloud makes my heart ring like a bell.
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